Tears of Sorrow
by Kay-san
Summary: Kaoru's life hasn't been an easy one. She finally reveals just what happened in her past and Kenshin realizes just how strong and yet vulnerable she is. Lots of sap and WAFF.
1. A Child's Loss

I know, I should be working on 'Kaoru…the Saiyan??', but I had to write something full of sap, and I couldn't do that in my other fic without destroying my flow there. So, here we are! Hope you like!

Tears of Sorrow

Chapter 1: A Child's Loss

Kenshin padded on silent feet towards the end of the hall. Kaoru had locked herself inside that room earlier that day and hadn't emerged since. It was nearing lunchtime and Kenshin was becoming concerned. He tapped on the shoji with one knuckle and whispered out to her. "Kaoru-dono? Are you alright?"

He didn't hear anything for a moment but then Kaoru's voice came through. "I'm fine, Kenshin. I know I haven't helped with chores much. I'm sorry about that. I should be done here by dinner time."

He frowned at the forced cheeriness in her voice. Underneath the upbeat tone he could hear just a touch of grief and vulnerability. "I'm going to the market and Yahiko left just a moment ago to help at the Akebeko. Will you be fine alone?"

"Of course, silly. Don't worry." She paused and as Kenshin turned she spoke again through the shoji. "Ano…Kenshin…could we have tempura tonight?"

Kenshin paused, a bit perplexed at her question. "Kaoru-dono, it will be quite expensive to get what is needed…"

Kaoru cut him off. "I saved some money, Kenshin. There's a pouch in the blue vase in the kitchen. Use that please."

"Okay, Kaoru-dono. I'll return shortly." He was worried about leaving her alone, but didn't understand why she was so anti-social today. _Perhaps she just feels a bit grumpy today. It's probably nothing. _He tried to reassure himself, but his thoughts did little to help him. _Why did she lock herself in THAT room? _

There was one room in Kaoru's house that no one entered except for her. It was an unspoken rule, but well known. Kenshin had wondered what was in there, but never asked or attempted to peek. _I'll ask what was bothering her tonight. She said she would join us for dinner. I'll ask then. _He returned his thoughts to what would be needed for tempura and tried not to worry too much.

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Yahiko jogged down the street toward Akebeko. _Tae and Kaoru have been friends for a long time. Maybe she knows what's up with her. _He would have never admitted it to anybody but Kaoru's behavior today had him concerned. It wasn't like her to shut herself off from the world. And what was even more odd was the fact that she went into the room at the end of the hall. He'd only seen her go in there once to dust and when she came out she looked like she had been crying. 

He reached the restaurant and quickly pulled Tae to a secluded corner. "Yahiko! What's wrong with you?" 

She looked at the young man's expression and motioned for him to sit in a booth with her. "Tell me what's bothering you."

"Well, busu has been acting strange today. As soon as she came out of her bedroom she went straight into that room at the end of the hallway and hasn't come out since. That's not like her." He waited for Tae to say something. She fixed her gaze on the wall behind him and took a deep breath.

"I know what's wrong with her. Yahiko, you need to be extra nice to her right now. No name calling, no jokes about her cooking, nothing mean AT ALL." The force in her voice made him shrink back a bit. "Surround her with friends. I can't be there for her because of some business plans I have. But, ask Megumi and Sanosuke if they can stay over at the dojo tonight. Also, it might be best if you see if Dr. Genzai will stay over. He knows what's going on as well."

Yahiko's interest was peeked. "What's wrong, Tae?"

"It's not my place to say. Just be nice to her. Trust me. She needs support right now."

Yahiko was upset about being kept out of the loop, but tried to set his mind on his work. _I'll invite everyone over after work. If Tae says to do it, it must be something that will help. _

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Kaoru looked at the kimonos in the closet again. She ran her fingers over the fine silks. "You always had extraordinary taste, Okaasan." She gave a sad giggle and went over to a chest on the floor. "Otousan's gi and hakama sets." She closed it back up and sat in the middle of the room again. "I miss you both so much. I just wish you were here to tell me what I'm doing right or wrong in life. I'm so unsure of things most of the time, but I do as you both told me and follow my heart. I hope you're both proud of me." The tears just wouldn't come. She had felt like crying all day, but couldn't. It was simply impossible for some reason. She lay down on the floor and stared at the ceiling, waiting for someone to come home. "I really should go out and help with dinner. I can't make them worry anymore. It isn't fair."

She listened for the gate and sighed when she finally heard it open and Kenshin's familiar greeting was called out. She left the room, locked it, and greeted Kenshin.

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A/N: Well, there's the first bit. This will probably only have 5 or 6 chapters. Not a very long story. Please respond and let me know if you have anything you'd like to see happen. I'm sure you have the main idea already! This is the first story I've written without knowing how I'll end it! Kind of nerve wracking! See ya next chapter!

(I use exclamation points way too much.)


	2. The Night Dreams Ended

Okay, I know I haven't updated this in FOREVER! Sorry to those who may have been waiting! Love ya!

Disclaimer: Don't own Kenshin & Co. They belong to Nobuhiro Watsuki (did I spell that right?) and Sony and other people. 

Tears of Sorrow

Chapter 2: The Night Dreams Ended

Kenshin looked at Kaoru again. She was sitting with a book in her lap, looking at the pages, but he could tell she wasn't actually reading. Her eyes weren't moving and they weren't focused on anything. 

"Kaoru-dono?"

Kaoru jumped a little and looked over at Kenshin. "Yes?"

He gave her a concerned gaze and smiled slightly at her. "If something is wrong, you would tell me right?"

She didn't want to lie, but she didn't want to involve others in her grief. She had endured over the years on her own and she would continue to do so. "I'm just remembering the past, Kenshin. Don't worry. I'm fine. Nothing I haven't handled before!" She gave him a small reassuring smile and closed the book. She let her head fall back against the wall she was sitting against and closed her eyes. 

Kenshin glanced at her one last time before getting up to prepare dinner.

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Yahiko ran as fast as his legs would carry him to Megumi and Dr. Genzai's clinic. He rounded the last corner and ran straight into what felt like a brick wall. Standing up and rubbing his poor tail end, he got ready to spit out an angry exclamation when a familiar voice greeted him. "Well, if it isn't Yahiko-CHAN!"

"Sano, I don't have time for this. Kaoru is having some sort of problem that Tae won't tell me about and I'm worried. Tae told me to ask you, Megumi and Dr. Genzai to stay over at the dojo tonight." Yahiko looked up at the ex-gangster with such maturity that Sano forgot he was a kid for a second. 

Sanosuke rubbed the back of his head. "Sure, I'll stay over. What's up with Jouchan?"

"Like I said, Tae won't tell me, but she said she knows what's bothering her. I'll tell you the rest with Megumi and Dr. Genzai."

The two entered the clinic to find it empty. Yahiko heaved a sigh of relief and called out, "Megumi! Dr. Genzai! I need to speak with you, please!"

Both doctors emerged from an office. Dr. Genzai greeted them happily. "Oh, Sanosuke and Yahiko! Come on into the office. What brings you here?" He motioned for them to sit and they did so silently.

Yahiko spoke first. "I need to talk to both of you. Kaoru has locked herself in the room at the end of the hall today. You know, the one no one can enter except for her? Anyway, she won't come out, she won't talk to anyone and I'm worried about her. Tae

won't tell me what's going on and just said I needed to surround her with friends and be extra nice to her."

Dr. Genzai looked puzzled and then it hit him. "Oh my goodness. How could I have forgotten about today?"

Megumi piped in. "OHOHOHOHO! I'll just have to go over and take this opportunity to show Ken-san that Kaoru is just a child who pouts in her room all day." 

Dr. Genzai practically yelled, causing the other three to whip their heads to him. "YOU MOST CERTAINLY WILL NOT! IF YOU DARE, I WILL FIRE YOU FROM MY CLINIC! IS THAT UNDERSTOOD?!"

Megumi looked ready to burst into tears herself, but kept her composure. Dr. Genzai took a deep breath and began again. "Kaoru-chan has not had an easy life as you all know by now. Today is a day she remembers with a heavy heart. She truly needs support. So much was taken from her six years ago today. And tomorrow is the three year anniversary of another tragedy."

They all nodded and Dr. Genzai stood. "We will close the clinic early and head over to the dojo in a few moments. You two go on ahead."

Yahiko and Sano nodded and took off.

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Kaoru swung the bokken down again. Harder and harder, she would swing. Practicing was a more productive outlet than wallowing in self-pity. She finally swung one final time with an ear-piercing scream and with all her might. The force made her spin around and she stumbled into a wall and slid down, finally crying the tears she couldn't earlier.

Kenshin came running into the dojo with Sano and Yahiko behind him. Kenshin saw her sitting there and his heart felt like it would burst from his chest. She had her head down, her shoulders were shaking with sobs and she sounded like she couldn't breathe, she was crying so hard. "Kaoru-dono?"

She began to hyperventilate while trying to speak between sobs. "Ken…Kenshin…  
I'm…I mean…my…parents…I…" 

Kenshin silenced her with a gentle voice. "Shh. It's okay, Kaoru." He wrapped her up in a hug and sat her on his lap, rocking her while she cried. "Please calm down, Kaoru. You need to breathe." He continued to rock her until Dr. Genzai knelt down beside them. 

"Kaoru-chan, you need to calm down. Slow down and take deep breaths." He patted her hand while she struggled to get her breathing under control. 

Megumi realized now how evil she had been earlier. Certainly whatever problem Kaoru was having, it was a major one. She had never seen her cry like this, so broken and forceful. Kaoru was usually strong and independent, but right now she was a frightened young woman who needed her friends' help.

She had finally calmed enough to speak. "I'm sorry, everyone." She gave a sad, watery giggle. "Poor little Kaoru, crying over things that transpired years ago. I'm really sorry to worry you all like this."

Dr. Genzai shook a finger at her. "You should know that what worries them is that you won't talk about it. I understand it's painful, but these people are your friends and won't shun you for things you had no control over."

A moment of shame passed Kaoru's face and Kenshin suddenly was angry. If his worst suspicions were true, he would hunt them down and make them pay. He quickly changed his thoughts to happier ones, not wanting to upset Kaoru further. "Kaoru-dono, you can talk to us. Like I told you earlier." Kaoru nodded reluctantly and rose from his lap.

"I'm fine, really. You all are worried over nothing." She waved a dismissive hand and tried to smile. "Sometimes girls just need a good cry. Right, Megumi?" 

Megumi nodded at her, trying to be supportive. Her doctor's instincts took over and she quickly added, "A small cry maybe, but a breakdown like that means something, Kaoru."

Kaoru turned on her heel and left the training hall without saying another word. 

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Dinner was relatively silent that night. Kaoru didn't eat much, just stared at her food. It began to waver behind the tears in her eyes and she began to cry again. It was more silent than before, but still noticeable. 

Kenshin set his chopsticks down and shot a questioning glance to Dr. Genzai. The old doctor just moved to Kaoru's side and patted her hand, while Kenshin repeated his earlier actions. "Kaoru-dono, please tell us what is bothering you."

The desperation and fear in his voice made Kaoru relent. "All right. I'll tell you. Six years ago today, my mother passed on. She was the most amazing person I've ever met. Beautiful and graceful, the perfect wife. But, she had this fiery spirit and determination. She was brave and strong, standing up for those weaker than she was. She practiced swordsmanship with my father in private, but in public she was demure and reserved. I wanted to learn so much from her, but I was young enough that she hadn't started to teach me much. I had learned to sew, clean house and the manners expected of a woman. But I never learned to cook, play a musical instrument, ikebana, so many other things we're expected to know." She began to cry again and Dr. Genzai continued for her.

"Kaoru-chan's mother died of cholera. There was nothing I could do." He looked back to Kaoru. "You should tell them about tomorrow, Kaoru-chan."

A look of terror passed her face. Her skin went white, her eyes wide and fear-stricken focused on the floor. All in a rush, "Myfatherdiedthreeyearsago! That's all that happened." She ran from the room crying full force. She threw open her shoji and slammed it, rattling the whole house.

Dr. Genzai looked at the rest. "Perhaps, I should tell you about her father's death. That day Kaoru wanted to kill herself, but I didn't let her." He paused and took a shaky breath.

Sano looked at the old doctor. "If it's that hard to talk about, maybe you should let Jouchan tell us when she's ready."

Dr. Genzai nodded and rose from the table. He wiped his eyes with his sleeve. "I'll be heading to bed now. Everyone, don't let Kaoru be alone tomorrow. Take turns spending time with her." He left the room and turned back to look at Kenshin. "I need YOU especially to be with her. She feels closest to you." Kenshin nodded and Dr. Genzai 

left the room.

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A/N: I have NOT read the manga. So, any timeline inconsistencies, I'm very sorry. I would love to read it, but I can't read Japanese and I can't find a good manga translation web site. If anybody has a suggestion, I'd love to know where I could read it! Anyway, hope you liked and I'll try to post chapter 3 sooner than I posted chapter 2! Please review! 


	3. Disgrace of a Daughter

(Nervous giggle) Hehehe…guess I didn't keep the promise at the end of chapter 2. Sorry! I'm in line for a promotion at work and there's A LOT (9) manuals to read and it's taking up quite a lot of time. Not only do I need to study the manuals, but also there's a certification and THEN I have the actual interview for the promotion. (heavy sigh) But, here's chapter 3! Hope ya like! Oh, and a HUGE thanks to those who gave me manga translation websites! I've been slowly getting around to checking them out. Thanks again!

Disclaimer: Not mine.

Tears of Sorrow

Chapter 3: Disgrace of a Daughter

Kaoru slowly walked to the small bench and seated herself. She sat up straight, put one foot firmly on the floor and one on a peddle, both arms extended with slightly bent elbows and placed her fingers on the keys. She had never learned to play fully, but she knew one song her mother played often. She took a deep breath and began to play softly.

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Kenshin lay awake on his futon. So much had happened today, so many revelations about his beloved Kaoru. His thoughts kept returning to Kaoru's reluctance to speak about the events that happened three years ago tomorrow. He was scared. Plain and simple, he was scared. If what he suspected, had happened to Kaoru, then he knew he would be overcome with rage. He wouldn't be able to do anything about it now, and that worried him even more. He was concerned that his rage would endanger his friends. Would he mistake a friend for a foe?

His thoughts came to a screeching halt when he heard the soft music. He crept out of bed and tiptoed to the shoji, slid it open, and continued to tiptoe down the hallway to the source of the sound. That room. The sound led him to the room Kaoru had stayed in all day. He was about to knock on the door when Dr. Genzai emerged from his borrowed room. 

"Kenshin? What are you doing awake?" Dr. Genzai cocked his head to the side waiting for an answer.

"I wasn't able to sleep and then I heard music." Kenshin whispered back to the old doctor, not wanting to alert Kaoru to their presence. "What's going on?" He inclined his head toward the door, indicating he meant the music.

Dr. Genzai sighed and motioned for him to follow to the kitchen, when a sleepy Yahiko and a grumpy Sano came from Yahiko's room. They looked toward the room Kaoru was in and then to the two men who were already awake and fell in step with them. 

Dr. Genzai sat at the table and Yahiko and Sanosuke followed suit while Kenshin prepared some tea. Megumi came into the kitchen, completely dressed.

"Oi, fox. Why are you all dressed?" Sano rose an eyebrow at her.

"I was getting ready to return to the clinic. Someone needs to be there in case there's an emergency. We really shouldn't have left it unattended in the first place." She sat at the table and waited to hear what everyone was doing up. It was then she heard the music. "Beethoven's Moonlight Sonata. This is a lovely piece, but who's playing?"

Dr. Genzai spoke softly. "Kaoru-chan is playing."

Megumi gave him a questioning look. "I thought she said she didn't know how to play any instruments."

"She doesn't. This is the only song she knows. She plays it on the anniversary of her mother's death every year. I don't know what other rituals she has, but this has happened every year since her mother left this world." Dr. Genzai dropped his head to his cupped hands and rested it there.

Kenshin returned with the tea and poured everyone a cup, then sat and waited for the story to start.

Dr. Genzai took a deep breath and began. "Kaoru-chan idolized her mother. In her eyes, she was the vision of perfection. She could do no wrong. Kaoru-chan used to follow her mother around, trying to imitate everything she did, including her piano playing. She never gave Kaoru formal lessons, but just by watching, Kaoru picked up on her mother's favorite song and learned to play it by toying with the piano. She would sit and push the keys for hours trying to find the right chord and the right tempo." He gave a half-chuckle

his eyes focused on the vision of a memory. "Kaoru-chan eventually surprised everyone by figuring out the entire song. It was perfect. Her mother was so proud of her. She promised Kaoru that she would give her proper lessons starting when she turned 14. But that spring, two months short of Kaoru's 14th birthday, her mother died. Kaoru never attempted to get lessons from anyone else. She just plays the same song that was her mother's favorite."

Dr. Genzai rose from the table and everyone followed him to the room Kaoru was in and whispered. "This was Kaoru-chan's parents' room. She has kept all of their possessions in there just the way her father left them. She cleans them off, but never moves them from their places." He slowly slid the shoji to the room open and they saw a side profile of Kaoru. She seemed oblivious to their presence and continued to play. 

There was a collective gasp as they all looked at her. Her hair was arranged in a bun on top of her head, she was wearing a rather formal black kimono with silver leaves embroidered on it and she had a very serene smile on her face. Her eyes were closed, but a few tears were escaping. Dr. Genzai looked as if he'd seen a ghost.

"She looks EXACTLY like her mother. The hair, the kimono, it's surreal. Her mother looked exactly like this the day they picked a husband for Kaoru." He slapped a hand over his mouth when he realized what he had said.

Everyone turned to him expectantly and he knew there was no backtracking on that one. He clasped his hands behind his back and gave them a stern gaze. "Kaoru-chan does not like talking about it. Not about her parents, not about the events that transpired three years ago, and DEFINITELY not about her ex-fiancé. Don't bring it up." He turned swiftly and headed back into his room. 

No one had ever witnessed the old doctor being so forceful and knew this was not something to be trifled with. At that moment the piano stopped and they all turned horrified gazes back to the room. Kaoru was looking at them, but instead of being angry, she looked happy. She rose from the bench and glided toward them with a graceful gait they had never seen her employ before. "Please, come in. I've kept too much from you all. I need to get it out into the open."

They all entered and waited for her to begin. She unwound her bun and allowed her hair

to flow freely down her back and around her shoulders. She sat on the floor and motioned for them to sit across from her. 

"Kaoru-dono, are you sure you want to talk about this?"

"Kenshin, it's too hard to keep it in. I've tried to be this strong, independent woman who doesn't need anybody's help, but it eventually weighs you down and you have to let someone else know what's troubling you." She gave a trembling sigh and began to twirl a lock of her hair nervously. 

"As you all know, my mother died six years ago today. On this day, every year, I don this kimono, pull my hair back the way she always wore hers, and play her favorite song on the piano. Somehow it makes me feel more connected to her, kind of like she's still here. It's quite comforting." Kaoru gave them all a small smile and continued. 

"She wore this dress the day they agreed to marry me to a young man who practiced Kamiya Kasshin. He was one of my father's top students. Handsome, caring, kind, from a good family, a dream man really. But none of that mattered. I knew nothing of him when the attraction began and for a while, I believe mystery is what drew me to him. Finally, the silent flirting stopped and his family asked permission for our marriage once I turned seventeen. My parents, wanting a stable future for me and knowing I already had a crush on him, agreed and he began to court me. We were of course quite young, myself just thirteen and he was fourteen, but we had an innocent, budding romance." She smiled in remembrance and paused for a few seconds to reign in the threatening tears.

"His name was Keisuke Sakamoto. I was convinced it was love, and perhaps I did love him, but I was never in love with him. We never made it that far. Three years ago tomorrow, my father died. We were all here at the dojo and a group of bandits barged in, demanding all our valuables. My father, of course, got ready to fight and Keisuke was right beside him. They told me to run, to hide. But, being stubborn, I just hid around the corner, ready to fight if need be. Within a few moments, my father and Keisuke had defeated most of them. However, there were more outside and they began to attack from every angle. We were all fighting, my father, Keisuke and myself. My father was struck down by one of them who came up behind him. Like a coward, they attacked him from behind. I thought he was only wounded, so I began to fight his attacker. I was enraged and everything became a blur. It was just me and the bandit. He was using a katana, and my bokken was split in half. I groped around for something else to use and my hand closed around a hilt. Without thinking, I swung upwards to block his strike and then spun around to knock him in the back of the head, like I would usually do with my bokken. Only I wasn't using my bokken." Kaoru was crying openly at this point, letting it all out. "In my moment of anger, I had grabbed a katana and instead of just knocking him unconscious…" She began to shake with the force of her sobs and Kenshin put an arm around her. 

"Kaoru-dono, if you need to stop, you can." He rubbed a hand on her back soothingly, but it did little to help. 

"No, Kenshin. I need to finish this. This isn't where it all ends." She paused for several moments to regain control of her breathing. 

"I had killed a man. In a moment of blind fury, I had taken another life. I had forsaken the very idea of Kamiya Kasshin Style. I rushed to my father's side and he looked up at me, with tears in his eyes. I had never seen my father cry before. He said to me, 'Kaoru-chan, you did what had to be done. Do not think less of your self. I'm very proud of you. Live a happy life.' He took a few deep breaths and was gone. Keisuke however,

wasn't so forgiving. He ran from the dojo without saying a word. I tried to call him 

back. I needed someone to be there, to help me through it. I was surrounded by bodies, my father had just died and the one man that I thought I would spend my life with, had abandoned me. I didn't know what to do. 

For two days, I went about with my normal life. But the motions were mechanical, without feeling or emotion behind it. I couldn't cry, couldn't smile. I felt nothing, just this hollow feeling, an emptiness. Finally, on the third day after, Keisuke showed up with his parents. They called off the engagement. They had been so kind to me before, but they were cold and uncaring on that day. They treated me like some sort of animal who was beneath them. 

They left and Keisuke, who had been silent, stayed behind. I thought he would apologize for their behavior and say they just needed time to cool off and then things would be all right for us. Instead, he walked up and grabbed the front of my kimono and began yelling at me. He told me I was a killer, a cold-blooded murderer and he would never marry someone like me, a person who soiled the ideals of Kamiya Kasshin. He told me no one ever would marry me. Then he punched me, right in the face. I was crying, too hard to yell for help or scream. He pulled me up by my hair and did it again. He repeated it over and over, alternating between my face and my stomach. 

By the time he was done, I was too weak to move. I just lay there, believing I would die. It was a welcome thought. To be able to escape everything, and just follow my parents. Besides, what was left for me here? A broken engagement, no family, soiled ideals, I had nothing. Dr. Genzai found me the next day. It took me a week to wake up after the beating from Keisuke. My face was still battered, but at least you could tell who I was. Dr. Genzai said the only way he knew it was me was from my kimono. My face was bruised beyond recognition." Kaoru took another trembling breath and looked up from the floor. 

Megumi was almost in tears and the three guys looked ready to kill someone, namely Keisuke. "I never heard from Keisuke again. I have seen him, but we never speak. He had a profound respect for my father and I've seen him at my father's grave, paying his respects. I always keep my distance, not wanting to be seen by him." Kaoru got up from her seat and went to stand by the window. "I didn't want anybody to know about my past. It's hard to talk about and I thought if you all knew, you would think less of me. I'm sorry to keep secrets."

She turned to look at everyone again and Sano managed a smile. "Jouchan, I don't think any less of you. However, if I ever see that Keisuke clown, he's gonna end up needing thousands of stitches!" He cracked his knuckles and smirked.

Yahiko piped up. "Yeah! And I'll be there too! No one treats my sensei like that! I mean you can call her names and all, but you never hit a lady! Even a busu like her!"

Kaoru had to laugh at that. "Yahiko! I was beginning to worry about you for a second. You had been too quiet and serious for my tastes!" She threw her arms around the boy in a hug and he tried to push her away.

"Aw, c'mon, Kaoru! Everyone's looking!"

Everyone had to laugh at that. All except Kenshin, who had been keeping his eyes trained on Kaoru. He was flooded with relief knowing his worst suspicions were wrong, but the truth was also terrible and he would not let it happen again. 

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No one went back to sleep, since it was dawn by the time Kaoru's story was finished. Yahiko and Kaoru had their morning practice, followed by baths, and then breakfast. Kaoru seemed happier today than she had been the day before. She was almost like her usual self, just a little quieter. She helped Kenshin with the dishes while Yahiko ran off to the Akebeko and Sano went into town.

"Kaoru-dono, do you plan on visiting your father's grave today?"

"Yes. Why?" She gave Kenshin a puzzled look and he gave her his rurouni grin.

"May sessha accompany you?" 

Kaoru knew exactly what was going on. She gave him a sly grin. "Why yes you may, Kenshin. Although, in the past three years I've had no trouble with Keisuke and I've kept my distance, but if you need to tag along and make sure I'm safe, then go right ahead."

Kenshin blinked a few times and then his cheeks turned a faint hue of pink.

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Kenshin and Kaoru covered the last few feet to a thick tree. "I always hide behind this tree to make sure Keisuke isn't here before I go up there." Kaoru peeked around and then stepped out and motioned for Kenshin to follow.

She stopped in front of a grave marker and knelt down to pray. Kenshin did likewise and all was peaceful for several minutes. Kenshin felt a ki approaching and cracked an eye open to see who it was and noticed that both of Kaoru's eyes were wide open and she was close to trembling. 

"Kaoru-dono?" He whispered so he wouldn't draw attention to her.

"It's Keisuke. He's coming this way." She gave in to her trembling and shut her eyes tight. "Please protect us, Father."

A deep voice called out to her in a sarcastic, condescending tone. "Kaoru Kamiya, my former bride-to-be. What are you doing here?" 

Kenshin and Kaoru turned to look at him. He was close to Sanosuke's height, with dark brown hair pulled into a high ponytail. He had very dark, almost black eyes and was dressed in a medium brown gi and gray hakama made of fine cotton.

"K-K-Keisuke!" She took a deep breath to calm herself. "I have every right to be here. After all, this is my father's resting place. What are you doing here?"

"I've come to pay my respects to a great man. A murderer like you shouldn't be here, you disgrace the Kamiya name." He brushed past her and knelt at the stone.

Kaoru fought her tears and turned to leave the cemetery. 

Once they had reached the old tree they hid behind, Kenshin pulled her to the side.

"Kaoru-dono, you have every right to be there. He is YOUR father, not Keisuke's. You shouldn't allow him to treat you that way." 

She stared at her feet. "I know, Kenshin. But, it's easier to just leave and avoid confrontation. I don't want to fight at the cemetery. It isn't right." She looked up and pushed a lock of hair behind her ear. 

Kenshin thought for a moment. "We'll wait here and talk to him when he's done. Sessha won't allow this Kaoru-dono."

She gave him a smile and they waited.

Keisuke came down the path fifteen minutes later and Kaoru felt sick. She began to tremble again and Kenshin was wondering whether he made the right decision.

"Keisuke! We need to discuss something." Kenshin stood in front of the young man. His gaze wandered to Kaoru and a smirk crossed his face.

"So, Kaoru. You found someone to marry a murderer such as yourself. Congratulations."

Kaoru felt her eyes mist up and she whispered. "We're not engaged."

Keisuke felt like laughing. He had the power to make this woman tremble in fear every time he saw her. It was an exhilarating rush for him.

He cocked an eyebrow. "Oh? Not engaged? Well, you must be his whore then."

Kenshin drew his sword before anyone could blink. Keisuke was too scared to breathe as he looked into the fiercest amber eyes he had ever seen. 

"If I were you, I wouldn't speak of Kaoru in such a manner. She has more honor than you ever will. She killed to defend her life and the lives of you and her father. It was necessary at that moment. And a man who beats women, deserves to feel the same pain he inflicts."

The low, even voice of Battousai was like music to Kaoru's ears. She usually feared that he would overtake her rurouni, but this time, she welcomed him. She knew he wouldn't harm her and she felt safe from Keisuke. 

Keisuke's eyes widened when Battousai threatened him and he began to stammer out an apology. "I-I-I'm s-sorry, s-s-s-sir."

"Don't apologize to me, coward. Apologize to Kaoru. Compared to the likes of you, she's a goddess of honor." He pushed the tip of the sword so it was actually touching Keisuke's neck. 

Keisuke got on his knees and lowered his forehead and hands to the ground. "I'm so sorry, Kaoru. I know I shouldn't have mistreated you that day, but I was grief-stricken that your father was gone. I looked up to him. I know you were in pain as well, but I couldn't stop what I was doing. I'm so sorry. Please forgive me."

Kaoru bit her bottom lip to keep it from trembling. "I forgive you, Keisuke. However, I don't want to see you ever again. You may pay a visit to my father's grave, but do it on the day after the anniversary of his death. I don't wish to cross paths with you."

She gave Battousai a nod and a smile. He sheathed his sword and closed his eyes, breathing deeply. He opened them again and the violet of the rurouni shone through.

"Let's go home, Kenshin."

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Kenshin went out onto the porch for some fresh air and found Kaoru, leaning against a beam, staring out into the yard.

"Kaoru-dono?"

She gave a slight jump. "Oh, Kenshin! You startled me. What are you doing up so late?"

"I couldn't sleep. What about you?" He settled himself beside her.

"I keep thinking about everything that's happened today. I wasn't as sad as I usually am, and for the first time in three years, I'm glad I didn't marry Keisuke. I wouldn't want that same treatment to happen everyday. He was gentle during our courtship, but he was laughing the whole time he was beating me. I used to have nightmares about it. They finally ended about a year ago." She glanced at Kenshin and gave him a bright smile.

Kenshin noticed then that Kaoru's yukata was gaping slightly at the front, showing a fair amount of cleavage. Her hair was down from its ponytail and she seemed to be glowing in the moonlight.

Kaoru noticed his expression and couldn't figure it out. _Lust? Is that lust? Oh, Kami-sama, please let it be lust. Just let him see me as a woman, please._

Kaoru met his eyes and without thinking, licked her lips. Kenshin wrapped her in an embrace to try to keep from thinking about her lips. It was working until he noticed she was returning the embrace and was running her fingertips up and down his back, barely touching going up, and putting a great deal of pressure on them going down.

He tried to contain it, but a low growl escaped his throat. Kaoru had her eyes closed enjoying the much needed hug, but they snapped open when he growled. She smirked rather evilly. _I was just hoping for a kiss, but if he wants to go further, I'll gladly go along with it. _She knew such thoughts were improper, but she was nineteen and ready for this. She wanted it to happen and she wanted it to be with Kenshin.

She knew the effect of her fingers on his back, so she decided to expand her search. She continued the motions outward, from the center of his back to the edges and then up to his shoulders. She turned the raking motion into a rub and made small circles from his shoulders inward to the back of his neck. She had one hand rubbing the back of his neck and allowed the other to leisurely rub his back. She felt him slump slightly and grinned.

Kenshin closed his eyes, trying to regain some semblance of control. He knew if he pulled back now, he'd end up kissing Kaoru and if a hug did this to him, he was worried about how far a kiss would take them. However, if he didn't pull back, he'd lose control from the little massage Kaoru was giving him and it would go too far anyway. He finally steeled himself and pulled back.

Kaoru knew full well what she was doing and what she wanted, so she put a small pout on. The look he gave her when he pulled away was priceless. He was half panicking, half joyful that she seemed to return his affections. Kaoru didn't want to seem the young girl who was being taken advantage of, so she made the next move. She still had her hand on the back of his neck, so she moved it to run through his ponytail and then brought it back up to his neck without breaking eye contact. She pulled him forward and rose on her knees to meet him halfway in a kiss.

Kenshin's eyes widened in surprise. Kaoru didn't know what to do next, so she just set her lips against Kenshin's, hoping he'd take over from there. Kenshin began to respond to her kiss and Kaoru thought she'd pass out from sheer joy. He slowly traced her lips with his tongue and Kaoru gasped, allowing Kenshin a chance to kiss her fully. They pulled apart and Kaoru had one hand grasping the front of her yukata and a dazed expression on her flushed face. Kenshin had the same expression and his gaze wandered to her lips. Kaoru noticed and shivered involuntarily. He leaned forward and gave her a quick, more innocent kiss.

"Kaoru-dono, I think we should both go to bed."

Kaoru looked at him confused, and Kenshin realized his mistake. "I mean, me to my room and you to your room." 

Kaoru let out a sigh and Kenshin didn't know if it was relief or disappointment. But when she looked at him next, he knew what it was.

"Kaoru-dono, I don't want you to get caught in the moment and do something you'll regret." He smoothed the back of his hand down one of her reddened cheeks and then ran his fingers through her hair. 

"I know, Kenshin. I just…" She looked down, unable to finish the sentence.

"Just what?" He lifted her chin and noticed her whole face was red.

"Just…I just…wantedmyfirsttimetobewithyou." She closed her eyes and let out a breath, then reopened them. "I love you, Kenshin."

Kenshin gave her a true smile and a soft half-chuckle. "I love you, Kaoru. And as for the other thing you said…" He cocked an eyebrow and Kaoru blushed. "There'll be plenty of time for that after we're married."

Kaoru looked up expectantly and Kenshin took hold of both of her hands. "If you'll allow it."

Kaoru threw herself at Kenshin and began to laugh. "Of course, you baka! I want nothing more than this!"

He began to laugh with her and returned the embrace. A grossed out Yahiko found them cuddled up, asleep on the porch the next morning.

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A/N: Ok, that was a very lame ending, but I was out of steam. I realized I didn't have much romance in there, so I kind of jammed it all into the end. Sorry about that. I actually had to delete a whole page because it was turning into a lemon and I've never written one and didn't want this to be one at all. Just kind of found a groove and it was going too far! Anyway, please R&R. Does the end feel rushed? It does to me, but I'm always so critical of myself. Constructive criticism is much appreciated. Can't improve if no one tells me how to fix things! ^___^ Thanks for reading!!


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